that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
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