bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
If its not for food we ain't going out.
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