I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Randomize
