he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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