Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize