Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
he puts the penis in happiness.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
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