Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Randomize
