i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
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