am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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