Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Randomize
