I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
