Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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