pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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