Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize
