I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Randomize
