Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
and eventually we just all took our pants off
And then he peed in my hair
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