David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize
