"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
Randomize