I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Randomize