I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
