Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Randomize
