....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
do herpes really smell.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
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When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
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he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
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