I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Randomize
