I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
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