Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
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