Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
