i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
