I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
