We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
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