I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
