it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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