Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
