i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
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