I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
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