Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
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