I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
