Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Randomize
