Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
