Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
