The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Randomize
