You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I CAN MOONWALK!
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Randomize
