I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Randomize