I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I woke up wearing no shirt sleeping next to a half-eaten grilled cheese.
Well did you call the grilled cheese yet? Or r u waiting the usual 3 days?
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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