sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
MIDGETS
????
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
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