I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
