ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
Randomize
