can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
