I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Randomize
