Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
how does that bad decision feel?
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