Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Randomize
