Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
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